No Clean, Well Lighted Place Here


It’s 6:00 am, and I’m standing outside my office, waiting for it to open.  No, I’m not on trial, and no, I didn’t get a sudden case of overachieveritis.  Joe needed to be in work early so even though I knew my office wouldn’t be open yet, I volunteered to take the ridiculously early train with him.  Man, I am an a+ wife this week.  I really didn’t think I’d have a problem finding a Hemingwayesque clean, well-lighted place to have a cup of coffee and a muffin to kill the 15 minutes before my office opened.   Philadelphia is a major metropolis.  New York may be the city that never sleeps, but I didn’t think Philadelphia was the city that doesn’t want to wake up.

The only thing open at 5:30 in the morning in Philadelphia? Dunkin Donuts.  I think cops get a bad wrap about Dunkin Donuts — it’s not their choice, it’s their only option.  Not even Starbucks.  And, I googled Starbucks before we left the  house.  Big fat liars, those Starbucks guys, claiming they’re open at 5:00 a.m.  And major teases too.  I went to three Starbucks, all of whom purported to be open at 5:00 a.m. , and yes, indeed, they had employees at the counter, staring straight at me through the glass as I yanked on the obviously locked door.  I could almost hear their off key “ha ha’s,” as they twiddled their thumbs behind the register.

Life this week has been one big ha ha on me, I think .   Our kitchen rehab was finally finished, and what happened?  Our sewer backed up, filling our basement with poop.  And, when did Roto-Rooter show up, when they were supposed to be at our house at 5:30 p.m.?  Midway through the series finale of Madmen.  So, first, I watched Joan get dumped, and then I watched the camera that the Roto Rooter man snaked through our sewer pipe like a colonscopy, to see our clog.   While he flushed out our pipe with glee,  for he was one happy sewer guy,  I had to wait until nearly midnight to find out Don Draper’s fate, and to learn that I had been watching an extended Coke commercial every Sunday night of my life for nearly 8 years.  Ha ha on me, again.  I don’t even like Coke, I like Pepsi.

But, our basement is now clean, and it’s certainly not a horrible thing to be at work two and a half hours early.   And Peggy and Stan did get together, so that was something.

So, I don’t have any links for you this early Tuesday morning.  It’s not that there aren’t “things I’m loving today,”  — just because my basement filled up with poop doesn’t mean it sucked the heart out of me, but I just wasn’t on the internet this weekend.   Yureeka!  That’s what I’ll do now! Pinterest, feedly, Facebook, you are open!  Unlike Starbucks, you do not have a glass door with a lock on it.  I still have an hour and a half before I have to go to court – there’s always the internet.  It’s always open.

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