My 2 Cents on Rihanna
You think when the phrase, “For my 2 cents” was “coined” (har har) 2 cents was worth anything? I think it probably was – I think once upon a time, unsolicited advice was probably worth something – because it didn’t come from the internet, it came from a face to face conversation, from a parent, a teacher, a mentor, a friend. Now, with everyone throwing their 2 cents into the mix, you’ve got a pile full of pennies, and opinions that don’t mean a whole hell of a lot. And, when Oprah chimed in on her show Friday, and addressed Rihanna directly about the beating she took from her still boyfriend Chris Brown, and said unequivocally, ” He will hit you again” – it joined the cacophony of impersonal voices, and probably fell, although thonderously, on deaf ears.
And my 2 cents – after Oprah??? Worth nothing. No, if anyone is going to have a hand in giving 2 cents worth of sense to Rihanna, it’s going to have to come from a familiy member, or her BFF.
And, her dad in the media, seems to be saying something like, justice in this case isn’t possible, telling US Magazine, justice can never be served in this situation . . . He can’t feel the pain she felt. I don’t believe in hitting a woman. I hope everything works out better for them. I don’t feel happy or sad. He’s in the court’s hands. Let justice prevail.”
Oh, no, justice is possible. Chris Brown is being prosecuted, and if he’s guilty beyond a reasonable doubt based on proofs presented by the prosecution, then there you have it, justice.
And, if he goes to jail – so be it.
Is it justice?
What’s an eye go for in society these days – still an eye?
Justice has never been as simple or as possible as an eye for an eye. And, inherent in the idea that our criminal system provides justice, we have to accept that justice will not always be fair.
And, who says it should be or has to be?
Rihanna’s dad says, “He can never feel her pain?” Well, what does that have to do with justice? He doesn’t have to feel her pain, he has to be punished for her pain.
So, punish him.
Rihanna’s dad has also said something about her speaking out, on behalf of all women, and emerging a hero. You know what, don’t worry so much about her hero-dom. Just keep her alive.
Because that’s what Oprah really should have said –
He will kill you.
I once had a client who beat his girlfriend into a 2 month coma. He was charged with Attempted Murder and Aggravated Assault. He didn’t have a problem with pleading guilty to Aggravated Assault, but about the Attempted Murder, he just kept saying, “I wasn’t trying to kill her.”
Well, you know what – what were you trying to do? If you beat someone that badly – what were you trying to do if it wasn’t kill her.
And Chris Brown, if you try to push someone out of a moving car while you’re beating the crap out of her – what were you trying to do if not kill her?
And that hero stuff – that role model stuff? Rihanna didn’t run for a position called “role model.” She sang a few songs, sold a few records, wears pretty clothes and makeup. We didn’t elect her to any office. She is not accountable to anyone but herself – she needs to leave to save her life, not for any other reason. It’s hard enough for women to leave abusers when it’s private, can you imagine being in the national/international spotlight with a bunch of bloggers throwing in their worthless 2 cents?
But her self-accountability does go one step further – if he hit you (while trying to kill you, because that’s the only thing that level of violence is meant to do), he will hit any children you have with him. Period.
Rihanna is not safe. That is what’s not fair. And the only justice, is leaving him, because no matter what happens to Chris Brown — jail, probation, anger management, whatever — won’t mean a thing if she’s dead.